The fire or The fireworks

What it is about Diwali? Since childhood, I remember associating the crispness in the air to the festive season that brought 10 Dussera holidays and another 20 days of school full of anticipation, for the couple of days when the lights light up the earth and sky. Is it just the anticipation or something more, because if I sit back and think, Diwali always brought along the restrictions of being able to spend only that much amount on crackers/gifts/shopping, rest was looking up at the sky and enjoying the sights while some affluent families displayed the more designer fireworks. Now I can afford all that to a certain extent, still there is the sense of something amiss- the anticipation, the excitement, the dream…………or something else. I am not sure, like most of the other things in life.
May be it is just the easy innocence of childhood, the ability to enjoy small things in life that has made all the difference. IT is always the fire not the fireworks that bring in the excitement, the exhilaration, the fun of the festival. As the fire slows down, the fun seems to be diminishing too. But it is not the chronological age that does it, as always the mental age that defines the fire, the zeal to live and celebrate. Wish there was a way to relearn the old younger way, till the one we will make do with the fireworks alone!